How do you stop someone from toxic dumping on you?

There always seems to be that one person for whom life is absolutely horrible and getting worse and they can’t wait to tell you all about it and drag you down the road of misery with them.

 

Bonnie Sussman-Versace started us off by sharing that she used to be that person and it took someone pulling her aside and saying, “Hey do you realize…” before she even noticed it.

 

Now she uses the physical action of putting her hand up to stop someone in their tracks and give her an opening to ask what is going on with them.

 

Gary Fredericks goes straight to the point and makes the timeout sign with his hands (Notice that is also a physical sign to pattern interrupt and get someone to stop talking) and tells someone that is too much information. I don’t need to hear it.

 

Todd Karges brought up the relevant point that if it is your leader who is dumping on you, telling them to stop talking isn’t really an option. Instead, you might use empathy and ask questions to try to understand what is going on with them and hopefully help them see they are being toxic.

 

I agree with that, assuming you have to emotional energy to give to the situation. There are times when being empathic is dangerous and you have to protect yourself by getting away from it.

 

How do you handle toxic dumping? What has worked or not worked for you?

 

Connect with the panelists:
Gary Fredericks: https://www.linkedin.com/in/garyfredericks/

CEO of On Point Partners where they provide back-office services for small businesses

 

Todd Karges: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toddkarges/

Has a background in project management and building agile development mindsets.  He is a transformation and change management practitioner and a leadership development coach.

 

Bonnie Sussman-Versace: ver-sayss https://www.linkedin.com/in/bversace/

Re-imaginer at FOCUSED. Where she specializes in developing leaders, building positive and productive workplace cultures, and improving individual, team and enterprise-wide performance

 

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

The Mental MacGyver providing luxury level support and coaching to executives, founders, celebrities and athletes.

 

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  #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

#toxic