Quick Hits

How do you tell the difference between being agile/adapting and blowing up a plan just to chase something new/shiny?

The term “agile” gets thrown around in the business world like it is the be-all and end-all to all things. But I and each of my panelists have seen chasing squirrels or shiny objects bring a project and even a business crashing down.

 

The things that came out of this conversation

 

• Make sure you know where you are going to begin with. If you don’t have a solid plan that is ideally written down somewhere, every new idea will look like have.
• Have a solid team around you that isn’t afraid to push back and ask why you want to make a change
• Be careful of just doing things because it’s “agile” and you learned how great it is at a conference.

 

Entrepreneurs are amazing idea generators. It is often why they are successful. The smart ones know they need people around them to make sure things actually get finished because they are always off to the next thing.

 

In this conversation we kept circling back to why and does the pivot make sense in the overall plan for the business and for the people.

 

How do you know if you are making a wise pivot versus chasing something new and exciting that might not be a great idea for your success?

 

Connect with the panelists:
Francisco "Frank" Galindo: https://www.linkedin.com/in/frankgalindo-mba/

He has 20 years experience working in PR where he enjoys bringing people together and creating partnership relationships. He is in the US.

 

Brandon Mahoney: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drstartup/

Co Founder of Launch Point Labs, National venture firm where he is the expert in creating sales departments. He is known as Dr Startup

 

Bonnie Sussman-Versace: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bversace/

Re-imaginer at FOCUSED. Where she specializes in developing leaders, building positive and productive workplace cultures, and improving individual, team and enterprise-wide performance

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, dignitaries and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

  #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

#squirrels #shinyobjectsyndrom #pause

 

What do you do when you feel intimidated?

Glady Baradaran started us off by pointing out there are two ways to feel intimidated. One is – this person is so awesome and I want to learn from them. This feels positive even though it’s a bit overwhelming. (Like when I met Joe Montana and was so fan-girl I couldn’t even say hi.)

 

The second is when someone acts like they are better than you and you feel intimidated like you don’t matter. The example I gave was when I was trying to talk to someone and he was looking around/over me like I wasn’t worth listening to.

 

Diane Helbig realized that when she feels intimidate that she gets quiet, which is not her normal behavior. Perhaps out of a fear that the person will somehow use her words to be unkind and validate that she “should” feel intimidated.

 

Lisa McDonald added the realization that we can feel intimidated when we are trying to do something new. Fear, excitement, self-doubt and anticipation can all meld together into intimidation.

 

We talked about a few stories and then Diane shared something really powerful – use it as fuel for articles and posts. Create wisdom and share learnings.

 

We also flipped the question around and talked about when someone says to us “You are intimidating.”

 

Is that on us or are they intimidated? Those are different things.

 

What do you think? What do you do when you feel intimidated and what are the different ways that feeling comes into play for you?

 

Connect with the panelists:

Glady Baradaran: https://www.linkedin.com/in/glady-baradaran-msc-od-6238071a/

15 years of HR experience and a love for organizational development. Based in Canada.

 

Lisa McDonald: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisa-k-mcdonald-executive-career-coach/

Founder of Career Polish where she is an Executive Career Coach & Master Mindset Coach who helps people get career happy and life healthy

 

Diane Helbig: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dhelbig/

Is the founder of Helbig Enterprises where they serve business owners and professionals who want to realize better out comes and greater happiness. She is an author and hosts the podcast Accelerate your Business Growth

 

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, dignitaries and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

  #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

#selfworth #intimidating #confidence #worthy

How do you handle someone crying at work?

Racquelle Pakutz started us off by sharing that she is an empathic leader. Because she has employees who are young and may have a lot going on in their lives, her first instinct is to try to figure out what is going on and if she can help them.

 

Atif Agha added that his is always happy to listen and perhaps get the person’s manager involved, particularly if the crying is caused by a work issue. If someone has gotten to the point of crying, things have gone much too far.

 

But he also cautioned that if it is a personal, outside of work issue, that isn’t something that is appropriate for him to get involved in or that he wants to be pulled into.

 

Dawn Gagye agreed that there is certainly a personal line you don’t want to cross but it is important to lean into the situation to figure out where that line is and how you can help without crossing it and that a healthy organizational culture can make all the difference. 

 

I shared that crying could be a manifestation of several different emotions. Sadness of course but more often (at least in my experience) frustration or even anger. If I am at the point of tears in a work environment, I know I NEED to walk away immediately because my ability to be rational and edit what comes out of my mouth has likely disappeared.

 

Atif wrapped us up by acknowledging that yes, it is important to address crying at work but if it is a common occurrence for someone to cry about everything, there might be more going on there.

 

Have you had an experience, positive or negative, with crying at work? What have you seen be successful?

 

Connect with the panelists:
Racquelle Pakutz: https://www.linkedin.com/in/racquelle-pakutz/

Owner of Zen Freight solutions where they do 3rd party transportation, the Founder of the podcast Trucker Talks, and an author and will be releasing her second book, Unleashing your soul level magic, in march

 

Dawn Gagye: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dawngagye/

She is a Strategic Marketing Guide and does Done for you marketing strategies that eliminate the stress and confusion

 

Atif Agha: https://www.linkedin.com/in/atifagha/

Technology specialist doing data analytics and avid runner, based in Chicago

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, dignitaries and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits I post every week, plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Just let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

 

  #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

How do you keep your composure in stressful, public situations?

There were some amazing tips in this conversation.

 

Dr Bob Choat started this conversation by sharing a tactical breathing technique. Which I did not realize was the same thing as box breathing. Breathe in for a count of four. Hold for a count of four. Breathe out for a count of four. Hold for a count of four. Repeat.

 

Then Kali Regan took us straight into neuro science and gave us four high points for using emotional intelligence in our favor in stressful situations.

 

Lauren Schieffer,The Colonel’s daughter, shared that carrying a Q-tip will help you Quit Taking It Personally. (wow)

 

The thing we kept coming back to was that the better prepared you are the more likely it is that you will be able to keep your composure.

 

AND – if you realize you have lost it. Stop. Literally just stop. Take a break. Take a walk. Take a breath. You will never accomplish anything as long as you are not in control of yourself.

 

What do you do to help maintain your composure in stressful situations?

 

Connect with the panelists:

Lauren Schieffer: https://www.linkedin.com/in/laurenannschieffer/

Known as The Colonel’s daughter. She is a certified speaking professional doing keynotes and training focusing on significant leadership. Based in Kansas City.

 

Dr. Bob Choat: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bobchoat/

He has eight years military experience, worked with the LA PD, was a stage hypnotist, owned a wildly successful business and is going back to school for another PhD. This time in physics 

 

Kali Regan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kali-regan-a0b924139/

She has a bachelors in psychology from Unica university and is working on her masters degree at University at Buffalo and is the Executive Director – MyBrainDr where they do neural feedback therapy

 

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, dignitaries and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

  #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

#stress #managingstress #focus #keepingcomposure

How do you respond when someone “jokes” in an inappropriate way?

This might be a hot button topic.

 

In the time between when we recorded this and posting it, I had a situation where I did call someone out. Not for an inappropriate joke exactly but for using a slur to “jokingly” insult someone.

 

Frank Galindo, Paula Jenkins and Dr Cole Galloway had this really tough conversation with me. Listening back to it, I wish I had taken my own advice and asked the person why they thought it was okay to use the slur they did.

 

I would love your thoughts on the content of this video, what you do in situations like this and your feedback on the situation below. Was I a bully for creating a boundary?

 

This happened at a private, social, non-work event. All of the parties are personally well known to each other. There is a power difference between Person A and Person B. Person C is at the same level as Person A. None of us work together.

 

Person A: You look like a (insert homophobic slur).

 

Person B: Looked embarrassed and did not respond.

 

Me: You can’t say that. It’s rude and not cool.

 

Person A: Reasons and excuses why it’s okay and none of my business.

 

Me: I am not going to stand by and allow abuse to happen. If I hear it it is my business and I am going to say something. Please do not use that language around me.

 

Person A: It’s not abuse.

 

Me: Yes. It is.

 

Persona A: Awkwardness and glaring but no verbal response.

 

Later –

 

Person C: If you want to be part of this social circle you really need to mind your own business. We go along to get along here. Stop policing and bullying. Just because you have a problem doesn’t mean it is actually a problem. If you REALLY can’t help yourself, say something privately. Not in front of other people.

 

Me (repeating myself): I am never going to let abuse just happen. If the culture here is to let abusers slide and not let the person being abused know I’m not okay with what is happening, this group isn’t my people.

 

Person C: You made the situation really uncomfortable for everyone. 

 

Me: As opposed to it being uncomfortable just for Person B.

 

Person C: If they have a problem, they can speak up for themselves.

 

Me: Since I’m being shut down for speaking up and I have more power/status in this group then they do, I doubt it.

 

What is the right thing to do in that situation?

 

Connect with the panelists:
Cole Galloway, PT, PhD: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cole-galloway-1ba715107/

Paula Jenkins, MBA: https://www.linkedin.com/in/paulajenkinslfsconsulting/

Francisco "Frank" Galindo: https://www.linkedin.com/in/frankgalindo-mba/

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, dignitaries and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits I post every week, plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Just let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

 #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

Is the pressure to “act like a man” a real thing and where does it come from?

This was a tough conversation. I’m very thankful these three guys were brave enough to have it on the record with me.

 

The one thing they all agreed on is that there is certainly societal pressure to “act like a man.”

 

But Brandon Mahoney pointed out that there is also this idea of “toxic masculinity” to be avoided.

 

(Which makes me wonder if the message is to act like a man but no too much.)

 

Gary Fredericks – who spent many years working on Wall Street made the comment that the pressure isn’t just to win but to crush your competition in the process.

 

Stewart Wiggins brought up the pseudo-machoism in the military and in sports – sickness, injury, concussion, breaks, sprains? Doesn’t matter you play through it.

 

(I want to say there isn’t the pressure to do that anymore but I don’t think it’s true. When the NFL session ended and you heard the announcers praising guys to “want it” badly enough to play through injury and bad mouthing players who won’t.)

 

And does the idea that men should act like men go hand in hand with the idea that a woman who is confident and good at something can emasculate a man? (Can someone please explain to me how I am responsible for making sure a man feels good about himself and can “act like a man”?)

 

When Gary said that he has always been attracted to intelligent and independent women, both Brandon and Stewart were nodding. Does it take a man who is confident in himself not to be threatened by a confident woman?

 

Are we still telling boys they aren’t allowed to cry?

 

Is masculinity seen as a bad thing? Is holding a door open no longer a good thing?

 

When someone says, “be a man” or “act like a man” what are they actually telling a man to do?

 

If the conversation after we turned the recording off is any indication, there is A LOT to be discussed on this topic and we, as a society, are not doing a good job having open dialogue about it.

 

Connect with the panelists:
Stewart Wiggins: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stewart-wiggins/

Induna Advisors – where he offers Fractional Chief Operating Officer services and Brings resources together to help scale your business.

 

Brandon Mahoney: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drstartup/

Co Founder of Launch Point Labs, National venture firm where he is the expert in creating sales departments. He is known as Dr Startup

 

Gary Fredericks: https://www.linkedin.com/in/garyfredericks/

CEO of On Point Partners where they provide back-office services for small businesses

 

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, dignitaries and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits I post every week, plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Just let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

 

  #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

#beaman #toxicmasculinity #incel #mansman

 

  

When is venting productive and how do you tell when it becomes a negative spiral?

There have been some studies that have suggested that venting – the idea of releasing emotion by talking about something – is a fallacy.

 

In my experience I have certainly seen people wind themselves up as well as get the emotion out by talking through something.

 

I wondered how other people thought about venting so I asked Bonnie Versace, Steward Wiggins and Dave Roberts.

 

Interestingly this conversation ended up being about the risks of venting on social media and wondering if the pandemic has made us worse at communicating important things more than about noticing when venting was productive or unproductive.

 

Stewart asked a question at the beginning about venting and emotion. If there isn’t emotion attached, I don’t think it qualifies as venting.

 

What does “venting” mean to you and how do you tell if you or someone else is unwinding a situation or getting further into a tizzy about something?

 

Connect with the panelists:
Bonnie Versace: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bversace/

Re-imaginer at FOCUSED LLC. Where she specializes in developing leaders, building positive and productive workplace cultures, improving individual, team and enterprise-wide performance.

 

Stewart Wiggins: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stewart-wiggins/

Induna Advisors – where he offers Fractional Chief Operating Officer services and Brings resources together to help scale your business

 

Dave Roberts: https://www.linkedin.com/in/david-roberts-56690513/

Teacher, co-author of the book When the Psychology Professor Met the Minister and a bereavement support specialist

 

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, dignitaries and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits I post every week, plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Just let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

 

#QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

#venting #complaining #toxicdumping

 

 

How do you overcome self-doubt?

Self-doubt can be a significant obstacle in personal and professional growth, but overcoming it can lead to great success. In this conversation, we discussed how we have worked through or around self-doubt. The turning point is when we realize that we are in control and can overcome obstacles.

 

Jim Tam suggested that self-doubt might come from setting high expectations for oneself. But do you think lowering the bar is the way to get over that? Not expecting so much of yourself?

 

Keji Moses pointed out that our internal dialogue plays a significant role in self-doubt. It is important to reflect on what is true and false, having an honest conversation to navigate through such experiences.

 

I don’t think imposter syndrome (the formal name for self-doubt) can be entirely conquered, but it can be managed, and used as a motivation to do better. (Link to my TEDx talk: https://youtu.be/k7HKJn7NDZs)

 

Influences around us, like our parents, can affect what we think about ourselves, so it is important to be careful about who is giving us messages. The goal is to give it the best try and not let self-doubt hold us back.

 

Ed Samuel gave the advice that sometimes it is helpful to have someone else in the room to support you and help you quiet the negative voice in your head.

 

Self-doubt is a common internal struggle, but we can conquer it by setting realistic expectations for ourselves, being honest with ourselves, and not letting negative messages from others affect us. Overcoming self-doubt is a continuous process that can lead to personal and professional growth.

 

Connect with the panelists:
Jim Tam: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jimtam/

Is a Principal Client Director with Korn Ferry’s Digital group where he advises organizations on how to improve their sales effectiveness through using world-class sales methodology and technology. He is based in Dallas.

 

Ed Samuel: https://www.linkedin.com/in/edsamuel/

Is a career coach at Sam Nova where he helps mid to senior leaders get to a better place, whether they are working or in transition.

 

Keji Moses CMgr FCMI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/keji-moses-ceo-mayahs-legacy

Founder and CEO of Mayah’s Legacy where they support women and families suffering from pregnancy loss

 

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits I post every week, plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Just let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

 #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

#selfdoubt #impostersyndrome #confidencebuilding #careercoaching #personaldevelopment.

 

 

What is the difference between worry and fear?

This conversation started off a bit rocky when Tim Hawkes said, “You're not going to need 10 minutes for this one, Robyn. You know your subjects, I've got this one nailed right easy, is everything nice and simple. Fear is short, worry as long there you go.”

 

But is it really that simple?

 

Brandon Mahoney agreed adding that fear is knowing what is going to happen and worry is not knowing what is coming next.

 

Fayaz Nagoor Shaikh also agreed saying that worry is when nothing is actually at stake and fear is when everything is at stake.

 

Then I asked what it means to fear the future and suddenly we weren’t quite so confident we knew what we were talking about.

 

Does personality have something to do with whether you are fearful or worrying?

 

Is it a time-bound thing; fear is short-term, worry is long-term?

 

For me fear is big – This is a problem! While worry is more a constant drip of distress like water torture.

 

Can you be worried about not being able to overcome fear? Brandon asked that question and … we got nothing! Maybe?

 

Where does nervousness fit in there?

 

We had a lot of fun with the conversation and Tim might have nailed it with his third theory when he said that fear and worry are the same thing across spectrum.

 

What do you think? What is the difference between fear and worry and do we use them to mean different things?

 

Connect with the panelists:
Tim Hawkes: https://www.linkedin.com/in/timhawkes/

Brandon Mahoney: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drstartup/

Fayaz Nagoor Shaikh https://www.linkedin.com/in/fayaznagoor/

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits I post every week, plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Just let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

  #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

#overcomingfear #copingwithworry #stressmanagement #anxietyrelief

What does “having a community” mean to you? How did you find yours?

I have always been interested in how communities are created and how to find those that really fit me. I have been part of groups where I didn’t really fit in that well and there have been others where I felt accepted and my skills were used to their fullest without me feeling like I was being taken advantage of.

 

I wondered what being part of a community meant to other people so – I asked.

 

Mohan Ananda started us off by defining community – “A group of people with similar interests from the same interest or same background” and then reminding us that sometimes communities have conflict and you have to be willing to work through that with kindness and patience.

 

Rick Alcantara added that what community means to you is fluid and can change over time. When you are young it might be the people who live in the same vicinity as you.

 

As we become adults, we become members of lots of different communities. Some that overlap and some that are completely unique to each other.

 

There is also the idea of building an online community through social media engagement. 

 

Philip Tate shared that being involved in lots of different communities allows him to be curious and learn from all kinds of different people.

 

There were a few suggestions for finding your community – join interest groups, go to events and talk to the person who looks like they don’t have anyone to talk to, ask for referrals from people you know. Online it only takes a quick search to find a group about anything.

 

What does community mean to you and how did you or do you find yours?

 

Connect with the panelists:

Philip Tate: https://www.linkedin.com/in/philiptateaprfellowprsa/

Dr. Mohan Ananda: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mohanananda/

Rick Alcantara: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rickalcantara/  

 

Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/

Concierge High Performance Psychologist providing luxury level support to executives, entrepreneurs, celebrities, dignitaries and athletes as well as the Facilitator of the Quick Hits podcast

 

 

Want a summary of the Quick Hits I post every week, plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist to show up in your in-box every week? Just let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/

 

  #QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.DrRobynOdegaard.com

 

#community #likeminded #belonging